Social Diary -- Sunday, Sept 12th, and Monday Sept 13th 2010

Went to the WaDuke in the evening, had fun; came home and drank more, played stairphone, everyone passed out except Ryan me and Char. Ryan started compulsively cleaning, waited up with me and Char until 8 am so he could drive her back to West so he could spend more time w/ me.
We come back to the house, and he says it's sad I can't sleep in my room anymore; says I could sleep in his. I jump in his bed and we cuddle, and he kisses me. He gives me head and vs/vsa, and he says I'm the best he's ever had. We don't have sex b/c I'm afraid w/ Ted and Steven upstairs and nxt door, so we just cuddle and go to sleep.
We wake up Mon morning and go into Rollins'room and have sex;

Social Diary -- Saturday, Sept 11th, 2010

Charlotte's birthday night.
Went to BBQ at Erwin with Reese, Charlotte and Ryan; drama w/ Marcum happened.
Drove to Craig's with Ryan, had real talk. Ryan told me he'd had a crush on me since the day we'd met; asked me if I'd ever hook up w/ him. I said yes.
Went back to Erwin, Reese had puled a knife on Marcum; drove him and Charlotte back to our house.
Got ready for the night; took Char to The Republic, came back, she got stoned, passed out upstairs. Edwin, Jeff, Fed, etc came over, ate all our food, Edwin and Jeff hit on me. I tried to pass out on the couch, Ryan rubbed my back, Ted fell on the floor, Ryan kissed my cheek.

bright as laughing day, hopeful as a star

Are you breathing just a little, and calling it a life?
How can I know, truly, who I am, where I am meant to go, and what I am meant to be?
As I grow older, the world changes as only a matured set of eyes can see; the whimsical haze of childhood wanes like a tired filament crackling inside its lamp, fading to pale and left behind to be swept into the dusty corners of memory's keep.

lay in the stillness of a fighting-saints fairytale

Waterslide architects have been spying
the smooth of your back


Mapping blueprints
from the finger trails
adoring up your spine


stealing your design


(Derrick Brown, "Waltzing the Hurricane")





Here is an externalization of where my mind goes sometimes. What I see in my mind's eye. A world of ghostly, floaty colors and fantastical things.

On a summer's eve, this molten night

I'd like to escape from earth a while
And among the cliffs and whiskered rocks
Lost as a light is lost in light
Dance with you till day--








There's something so pure and resonating about these photos of Lily Donaldson, my words seem to stop in my throat and catch behind the cage of my teeth. It's beauty that goes to the body, deep and warm, imprinting in the brain like a pattern on foil.













(photocredit: Fashion Gone Rogue)